My boyfriend and I are watching Dream High. It’s the popular kdrama at the moment, about students at a prestigious high school that trains singers and artists. It has a cast of popular singers and is just lots of fun.
One character is a very talented opera singer with a horrible personality. Her “friend” (really a girl she takes advantage of and just lives in her shadow) gets into the school – the talented girl is admitted as a special case. In episode 2, the dancing teacher tells the one who got in this: one of the best things you can do for yourself is have a rival. She then makes it her job to outdo her former friend.
I have always had a rival to push me through school and whatnot, until now. I’ve used rivals as a way to push myself forward in life. Now I need to become my own rival, or find a way to move past it and motivate myself another way.
Until college, my main rival was my cousin. We were a year apart and were compared a lot. My next rival was during college. We were in the same major, she was doing better in everything I thought I wanted to do, and the teachers loved her. We even went after the same guy and all. This ended with college: she just had different goals than I do, like how she’s in grad school right now. My last rival rose out of spite. It was a friend that cut me out of her life after a small argument. Right out of college, she was doing better than me, which drove me to beat her at her own game (she was a journalism major, so I got a writing gig at Xanga I excelled at). Now I have a full time job in another field, while she has a few small jobs, and we’re not in the same league anymore.
I’m not alone in this kind of thing. Take a look at this Craigslist gem a friend of mine sent me this morning:
Nemesis required. 6-month project with possibility to extend
I’ve been trying to think of ways to spice up my life. I’m 35 years old, happily married with two kids and I have a good job in insurance. But somethings missing. I feel like I’m old before my time. I need to inject some excitement into my daily routine through my arm before its too late. I need a challenge, something to get the adrenaline pumping again. An addiction would be nice, but, in short, I need a nemesis. I’m willing to pay $350 up front for you services as an arch enemy over the next six months. Nothing crazy. Steal my parking space, knock my coffee over, trip me when I’m running to catch the BART and occasionally whisper in my ear, “Ahha, we meet again”. That kind of thing. Just keep me on my toes. Complacency will be the death of me. You need to have an evil streak and be blessed with innate guile and cunning. You should also be adept at inconspicuous pursuit. Evil laugh preferred. Send me a photo and a brief explanation why you would be a good nemesis.
British accent preferred.
LOL.
While I’m not alone, and it’s funny, it does make you sound crazy and it’s not the best thing! I can’t keep this up – I need to motivate myself in a more positive way, since so many of these turned out to be negative in one way or another. To be my own rival. Too often I feel like I can’t do something I want to do. I need to turn this into a situation that motivates me so that I can be the best darn Tiffany I can be.
I need to:
- Identify what I want to do, whatever it is
- Make small goals rewarding (like how I am treating myself to $120 of clothing when I hit my next weight loss goal)
- Just be more positive – my rivalships were too negative and I don’t need that kind of stress in my life (another goal for this year)
How are you motivating yourself? Do you have rivals?